Advice sought and Progress made

[peaceful_sands]

So I am decluttering apace but things are slowing down now I've got packed up a lot of the 'obvious' things to go, I am, however, left with piles of things that still need to be sorted and things that currently have no home.

My problem at the moment is this - I have things that 'should' go, things I don't use, things I don't really need, but I can't just throw them out/recycle them/give them away because I feel guilty. I feel bad about getting rid of things that I received as presents or bought as presents but then didn't need, getting rid of books that I haven't read, even when I'm not thinking 'oooh I wish I had enough time to read that' (there are plenty that do fall into that category and I'm not worried about not getting rid of those, after all I'm decluttering not actually completely emptying my home), some that I have no interest in ever reading, bits of jewellery (the accessory type - not the valuable type) and just loads of other things - clutter.

Does anyone else get to a point where they think I've got rid of a lot and I 'shouldn't' just keep getting rid of things that I haven't 'used up'? If so, how do you get past that?




Out
Tatty old washbag (bin)
Out of date contact lenses (bin)
Heads for razors I have lost (bin)
Cleared out underwear drawer (bin)
3 sweatshirts that were past their best (bin)
Recycling empty containers from bathroom (bin)
1 old shower curtain (replacement bought a while ago but I never got around to changing it - bin)
4 pairs of trousers (bin)
9 bags of miscellaneous trash from various drawers & storage boxes in bedroom (bin)
2 trash bag of cardboard boxes (empty packaging)/old magazines that had somehow accumulated in the bedroom)
1 worn out pair of shoes
3 old videos
1 t-shirt (bin)
3 ‘out of date boxes’ of face care stuff that looked very dubious after the years spent at the back of a cupboard
25 Books (to various other people)
2 books sold on Greenmetropolis.com


Total 59 out

In
2 DVDs
1 book
1 skirt
1 music CD

Total 5 in

Converted
1 ball of wool – scarf
4 balls of wool – 2 hats (some left over – debating trying to get a third hat out of them)


So in all I now have 54 (previous total out) + 59 (out) - 5 (in) = 108 out.

Comments

[havocthecat]

I think that's when people start setting up the "if I haven't touched this in X number of years (or whatever timeframe works), it has to go" deadlines. It has been very useful to me when it comes to clothing!

[peaceful_sands]

I've done that with a few things and it's worked to varying degrees. I shall have to be more ruthless about it! *grin*

[adair]

Ah, yes, can't quite let go because of guilt, or should use it up. I deal with a lot of both as well as I've seen it forever, how can I let it go.

For me these each take individual processes. Should use it up is fairly easy, mostly involving makeup and bath products. Put them out where I can see them works for me; I may try some out, and decide then if I really can use it, when it becomes to Use Now thing, and I don't buy any new version until it is used. if it seems mediocre I can often just dump it right then. These things never cause regrets if you toss them

Guilt has several sub-sets. Gifts from others - if you hate the gift dump it. If it's sort of 'I don't really need this but it's pretty' like the teapot and cup a friend gave me, I think about passing it on to someone outside the gift circle, or give it to my sister for her annual town garage sale. Gifts are gifts; the giver lets go of them when they are given to you; you can do what you like, but considering the givers feelings so far as not to send them to a place where they might be seen by the giver is good.

Books are an issue themselves for me; you seem to be doing well. I find I get rid of books I bought in the last few years and never felt like reading, or read and felt meh about. Books I'v had for 30 years or more, have not read since, but have seen forever; those are very hard to let go of because I know I will remember them and might at some point regret letting them go. This is particularly an issue for books I can't get from the local library, or easily replace. Science fiction, historical fiction, holder specialist history books, how to make things, older mysteries - all these tend to stay. I have not solved this problem at all.

[peaceful_sands]

Thanks for the tips - I've prioritized some of the bath products in order to try and get through them and in actual fact 'clearing out' the make up was one of the things I found easiest - the biggest concern when I was doing that was that I was going to throw so much out I had none left - apart from nail varnish, I don't wear 'real' make up often at all. Clothes weren't too hard to thin down on either - I started with the 'does it fit?' and anything that didn't and I stood little chance of getting back into any time soon, went straight in a bag. On the second pass, I asked, 'Do I like how it looks on?' and if the answer was no, it went in a bag. There are still a few things that I haven't worn in forever, but if the right occasion came along I'd like to have them on hand, so for now at least I'm keeping them.


They're good suggestions for the gifts too, some of which I've sort of put in place already. I think part of my problem with the guilt is that I feel like I'm being 'wasteful' by not using/keeping/wearing things out but I just need to face up to how things are and if I don't want my life cluttered then I have to put aside the 'wasteful' guilt feelings and get rid of things that aren't of use.

Although books are an issue in the sense of just how many I've got, I'm actually fairly content with my current way of dealing with it - I went through and found all the ones I had been given and wasn't going to read and passed them on to either friends, listed them on GreenMetropolis or gave them away according to what types of book they were (condition/size/genre). The ones that are left at the moment I would at least 'like' to read, so even though there are too many of them, it's okay because some of them I can already see they will be 'read once and then can go' and others will be kept. I guess what I'm aiming for, after all, is not an empty home but a home that is filled with things that I want to have in it and not cluttered with things I don't want that are impairing my quality of life.

[fred_mouse]

I have found that sometimes things that look necessary on the first, second, third look turn out to not be later. For example, one 'declutter' task I was given was to get rid of the unnecessary items in the linen cupboard. On the Monday, there was nothing to throw. Same on Tuesday. On Thursday, there were a couple of items. On Friday, suddenly I had a box of items that I didn't need any more - it just took the looking over and over again to start separating out.

Other tricks - I know I get declutter/decision fatigue, so taking everything off a shelf, and then picking out the stuff that I want to keep, and then just get rid of the rest makes this easier. And restricting myself to a 'class' of items - this week I'm just going to sort out books, next week I'll look at clothes, the week after I'll look at toys. To mix this up, restricting myself to a room, and asking 'what is the most important?'.